Listening for the Flame

I am Kaidi, from Estonia, a small Northern European country where fire has always been far more than just a flame.

Our parents and ancestors knew that without fire, there is no life. Fire was used to cook food, warm the home, and the most important place in the household was the sauna.

The sauna has always been a sacred space in Estonia. In the past, saunas were kept warm so that a traveler could step inside while on the road, dry their wet birch-bark shoes, and take a moment to breathe. People were healed in the sauna. Children were born there. Families gathered there.

Whisking with birch branches and hot steam were not merely pleasant rituals. They were acts of purification and healing, deeply rooted in our culture.

Perhaps this is where my own inner fire comes from.

I feel that the same force burns within me, the one that led our ancestors to keep the fire alive. My passion is movement: traveling, stepping into the unknown, seeking new experiences. Every new place feels like its own kind of sauna to me. It awakens me, refreshes me, and gives me strength.

The unknown does not frighten me. It draws me in, just as fire draws those who seek warmth and light.

If I were to describe my story simply, I would say this: I grew up in a culture where fire stood at the center of life, and that same flame lives within me. It moves me to explore, to wander, and to seek places that allow me to awaken and feel alive again.

I move, explore, and travel for the same reason a shaman lights a fire: to gain clarity, to experience a deeper layer of the world, and to let myself be cleansed of what is old or small, making space for something new.

My fire is ignited by diving into the unknown.

By saying yes more often than no, even when fear is present.

This is how I meet the beginning of a year.

Not by forcing direction, but by listening for the flame.

Kaidi

traveller · mother of four boys · leader · projector · wild woman

Kaidi is a co-founder of OME and the guide for Portal 1: Fire within cOMEunity.